Fields of Innocence
by R Amythest
Summary: [Songfic, One-Shot, Jaffar x Nino] Jaffar never lived long enough to see the defeat of Nergal, leaving Nino to wander and look for a love that will never come.


**Summary:** Songfic, one-shot, Jaffar x Nino Jaffar never lived long enough to see the defeat of Nergal, leaving Nino to wander and look for a love that will never come.  
**Disclaimer: **I don't own Evanescence or Fire Emblem 7.  
**Author's Notes: **I luff this song! And yeah... my first songfic after a whole year and 10 months of fanfictioning... --;;;  
**Dedicated to-** Amara, AKA Sailor Millennium, for showing me this song in the first place.

EDIT NOTES: All lyrics were removed due to the rule as of April 17, 2005. Spiffy line credited to Splash of LiveJournal. Numbered notes are now in parenthesis.

* * *

**Fields Of Innocence**

* * *

--- This section has been bastardized by FF.N. Thank you. _---_

* * *

10 years. 

It has been ten years since Nergal's defeat. I can be one of the few who claim to have ousted him from his position. I can claim that I have let the sunshine pass through to the world despite his darkness. I can lift my fingers to the air and watch the sunlight pass through them without worry, for my life has helped so many others.

And yet, my life is incomplete. And I know that it will always be.

I still remember what it was like to run through the marketplace, carefree and innocent. I still remember my brothers' carefree laugh, and I still remember the true Black Fang before its corruption.

And I remember Jaffar. I remember Jaffar.

I remember everything from his icy gaze to his quick, graceful movements, to the fluttering cape behind me whenever he would hold me close as he saved me in the midst of the battle. He would always land on his feet as well, never stumbling, never failing to save me.

He could always save me. But himself...

"And so it ends..." he had whispered to me before he fell, his dagger unleashing a harsh metallic sound throughout the stone chamber. It was his end. The end he had wanted from the beginning... But as I stood there, stroking the blood-stained dagger over and over... it came to me that perhaps it wasn't the end he wanted. Nor at the time he wished. When I looked back at him, he was gone.

And so, the only love I ever had died.

* * *

--- This section has been bastardized by FF.N. Thank you. -_--_

* * *

"Come in," came the voice from inside. The violet eyes peered warmly at me as the door opened. "Ah... I've been expecting you." His mouth curved upward slightly. "Have you decided?" 

I was quiet for a moment, before finally gathering the courage to look him in the eye. "Look, Talikare(1)," I pieced carefully, "I..." my voice wavered. I lowered my head, and for once I thought about my own voice. My voice... it no longer sounded like the happy girl I once was... it was a stranger to me. Has it really been that long? I swallowed, then tried to continue. "Talikare... I..." I looked up at him and his eyes, and suddenly I couldn't do it. What if he really was the one I was supposed to be with? Am I to sacrifice this only chance, like... like I did Jaffar? "I... I love you."

He offered me a gentle smile and came over, holding me close, closing the door behind us. He looked me in the eye again, and I wish I could've seen truthful warmth. But all I could see is greed.

I wish I could not see that. I wish I could not. The uneasiness caused my footing to waver for a moment, letting him swing me upward, forcing me into a kiss. I blinked, then realized for a fleeting moment that I had never kissed Jaffar before. Never.

Talikare had taken my first kiss. I was horrified and stiffened at the thought of the sage taking something of mine that belonged to Jaffar. He released me, setting me on my feet. I shook for a moment while he licked his lips in a slight motion. He smiled again, that haunting smile. "You're a good kisser."

"Th-Thank you," I shakily rasped, placing a hand on the couch for support. I looked at him with suspicion, but he had long diverted his attention to his pocket. He was... fingering something. No... it couldn't be.

"I... have been wanting to give this to you for a long time."

My eyes widened. "No!" I called, but I quickly covered my mouth. He looked at me and blinked, then sighed and came over. "I... I must go... I'll be back tomorrow."

His lips tightened slightly, and he took my hand. I winced, expecting him to kiss it, but instead, he took the box from his pocket and pressed it into my palm. "Take this home with you and think about it," he huskily whispered into my ear. I shook. I could not... I could not marry a man I did not love out of my own free will!

"I'll... I'll remember that," I rasped, my throat cracking in mid-sentence. I draped my cloak over my shoulder, shooing his hand away when he attempted to help. "I'll be back tomorrow with my decision." He beamed and hugged me one more time before turning me around and opening the door for me.

* * *

_--_- This section has been bastardized by FF.N. Thank you. -_--_

* * *

I headed home, the harsh fall wind causing my cape to billow and toss, blowing away what little heat I had within it. Fighting the wind, I clutched it to my sides, shivering. _He wants to marry me... he wants to marry me..._ it repeated like a never-ending mantra inside my head. I shook my head, crying. _Why? Why can't I just live happily with Jaffar...?_

_...Because he's dead._ My hand froze over my doorknob and two tears trailed down my cheeks. _He's gone. No more use moping over him._

Somewhere inside, I knew that I'd never meet him again here in Elibe. Never. _What's the harm?_ I thought miserably. _My heart's doing nothing in my own chest, anyway._ I put my hand over my chest, and my cape billowed out, sending chills down my body.

_He's gone. My heart will have no other true occupant. I suppose making Talikare happy won't cause any harm. Maybe, maybe I'll even love him._ I knew my last thought had no place in time. I opened the door, sank into the couch, and, in despite any birds chirping, food burning, or spirits wailing, I cried for the rest of the night over a decision I had made and could reverse.

* * *

_--_- This section has been bastardized by FF.N. Thank you. -_--_

* * *

"I've made my decision," I announced quietly. Talikare looked up from his hands and stared at me, and I mentally cringed. "I... I will marry you." 

"Do you love me?" he asked, scooting closer to me on the sofa.

"I will marry you," I repeated, my voice not wavering a single tone.

"_Do_ you love me!" he repeated, somewhat impatient, slinking an arm around my waist.

I remained silent, staring down at the glass of water in my hands. I took a drink, staring down at my reflection in the water. I looked in my own eyes, worn with an endless sadness. I shifted it in my hands, and in it, I saw Talikare's own eyes. Sharp. Eager. "No more than you do I," I responded quietly, watching his gaze falter, and for a moment, he displayed madness. When I took the time to lift my eyes to meet his, however, it was nothing but happiness.

"We'll be a lovely couple," he piped, clasping my hands in his.

_No lovelier than ragweed,_ I thought. He pulled me closer, and my head fell into his chest. He stroked my hair, and I squeezed a tear out of my eyes, where it lay in a dark splotch in his shirt. _And no more to him but a toy._

* * *

_--_- This section has been bastardized by FF.N. Thank you. -_--_

_

* * *

_

_(2)"Once upon a time, there was a boy and a girl. They loved each other dearly, but the girl's father refused to let her marry him. "What does he have to offer you? He comes from a poor family, and you have not been born to slave away in work!" he scolded. _

_"I love him," the girl defiantly snapped. "I want to live with him. I do not care if I must work as long as I am by his side."_

_But the father refused._

_The boy went to see a matchmaker, and the matchmaker was so touched by their relationship that she sent the girl's families presents constantly, in an attempt to win her over. Again and again, her father refused._

_Then one day, the presents did not come. They ceased for such a long time that the girl began to doubt him. Has he married an old widow? she thought in desperation. She visited the matchmaker months later, and with a soft tone, the matchmaker murmured, "He's long gone. He died."_

_The girl was thrown into complete hysterics. She refused all suitors, until her father finally forced her to marry._

_Her suitor and herself were riding down the road to her marriage. "Father, I want to see his tombstone one last time before I marry," she pleaded. Tight-lipped, her father allowed her._

_She cried out her heart until her wedding time was approaching. She put up such a struggle that her servant attempted to drag her back into the carriage. She struggled and slipped out of the servant's grasp, her head crashing into the tombstone. Her eyes were wide open, then slowly, slowly, she slipped down into the dirt._

_Behind the tombstone, two fairy-like creatures rose up and circled each other in the air..._

My voice broke, and I set down the book, eyes set distantly on the ceiling. Yes... a happy and bittersweet ending...

"Mommy... that was so sad..." Lugh sniffled. I placed an arm around his small shoulders. He was such a sweet child, despite the pains in the process of his creation.

"No it wasn't," I answered distantly and subconsciously. "They were together at the end. So it was sad that they died, but it was still happy because they were together."

"That's stupid!" Rei scoffed, dunking Lugh into the soft, rich folds of the bed. "She killed herself so she could be with some guy?" Lugh protested from inside the bed.

I was startled by this comment, and I picked Rei up and placed him aside. "No, she didn't kill herself! She just died..." I was starting to regret choosing this story for my kids, "but she wasn't too sad about it." Yes... so bittersweet. I placed the book thoughtfully on the nightstand. Perhaps it was her conscience. I sighed. A sad ending, yet so much better than mine.

I was faintly aware of pinching out the candlelight. "Rei... Lugh...(3) go to sleep now," I murmured, making my way off the bed. Rei pouted, growling and rolling over his twin on the bed. I felt my lips twitching to form a small, sad smile at their naïve, innocent childish antics. None could see it in the darkness. "Good night... I love you." I closed the door behind me, making my way slowly down the hall. I silently opened the door, where Talikare dropped his book to look at me.

"Children tucked in?" he questioned, putting a red ribbon into his book and laying it on the counter.

"Mmhmm," I replied dully, sitting down on the bed.

"What did you read to them this time?" he murmured, putting out the candle. "Not _Robin Hood_, I hope. I don't need them getting a bad impression of the rich."

"Because you're one?" I growled. He seemed to find amusement in my comment and drew me closer, kissing my hair. "It was... I believe it was _Oracle of a Fairy_."

He stopped his nuzzling and laid me on the bed. He was silent for a moment before asking, "The one where the girl dies at the end?"

"Both are dead," I replied, irritated. "Why do you care about what I read to the children?"

Talikare gave me an annoyed look. "You mustn't keep giving them thoughts of death..."

"Talikare," I told him carefully, "they have seen death are aware that it's around them. They have seen their pets and our livestock die before. They have seen the spells you cast on the termite colonies. They have even once seen the prisoner you executed."

"Yes," he sighed, "but... it's different..."

"How so? Why must you keep denying what I do!" I cried in frustration.

"Ah hush," he said, drawing me close and holding me to his chest in a possessive matter. "Such a child..." he muttered underneath his breath.

"No..." I monotonously murmured. "I wish I were. I really do. But I am a grown woman now. With responsibilities and obligations. And burdens. Good night." I hissed the last phrase, dragging the blanket onto the floor and huddling on it by myself.

"Oh Nino," he sighed, annoyed. "Don't be dumb." He rolled over to the edge of the bed and stuck out a hand. "Get up here."

"Oh, so I'm dumb now, am I?" I mocked, drawing away from his offered hand. He mistook this for a playful gesture, and he came down, carrying me to the bed and laying me down on it. He wrapped his arms around the blanket and I, sending my arm into an awkward position.

"Good night."

"...Good. Night." I found this forced. I closed my eyes and tried to think of a time when I was not as bitter.

I could not find any memory since Jaffar's leaving. Since my naivety and innocence had left me. Had I known it would come to this, I would not have traded all my childish delights for such a burdened maturity...

* * *

_--_- This section has been bastardized by FF.N. Thank you. -_--_

* * *

_"Jaffar!" I cried, waiting for his deep voice to reply. I ran out into the field, where he slowly turned to meet me. "Jaffar! Where are you going?"_

_"No where," he answered simply. I continued to gaze at him for a few moments as he wrapped his old cloak around me, holding me close and continuing to walk through the field._

_"That's nice to know," I murmured, wrapping my arms around his strong body. "So you won't be leaving me alone anytime soon, right?" I looked up at him with bright, hopeful eyes._

_He grunted, letting out a small smile; I've learned that that was his version of laughter. "No."_

_"Good," I sighed, looking up at him._

_We continued to wander aimlessly in the field, before he turned to me, drifting into the sky. "Wait! Jaffar!" I cried, tugging on his cape. A piece of it came off in my hand, and I gaped at the ripped cloth._

_A piece of despair overwhelmed me. "JAFFAR!" I screamed as he drifted into the sky, now crimson, the color of blood. "WAIT! YOU SAID YOU WOULDN'T LEAVE ME! WAIT! Ja... ffar..." I collapsed on the field, crying._

Haze surrounded me, and I opened my eyes halfway. "Jaffar... you said you wouldn't leave me..." I fell back to sleep again. That night, no dreams, good or bad, came to mind. No more dreams. No more thought.

And the next time I looked in the mirror, I thought nothing of my eyes, dull and emotionless.

A void.

* * *

1) Yes, he's an OC. cringe But look 'ere, I need OCs for this unless you want Nino to be paired with Erk. And Erk belongs to Serra! (Or... I guess Priscilla could work... but I prefer Erk x Serra.) 

2) This little "fairy tale" is a traditional Chinese folktale. Kinda like a Chinese Aladdin, 'cept without the magic, and with a better ending. I'll be doing a Raven x Lucius parody of it sometime, too. And I swear it's PG. My mom told me it when I was about 7, after all. As for the name later given, that's not its real name. I just came up with something nifty, 'cause I can't remember what it was and my mom's gonna be suspicious if I ask.

3) Nino's twin boys from Fire Emblem 6. Rei is the one with the evil personality, and he's a shaman. Lugh is the one who looks a lot like Nino, and he's the 'good' one. He's a mage.

* * *

**Endnotes:** I will most likely post a partner fic to this. Not quite a sequel, more like a companion fic that could go hand-in-hand if you wish to view it that way. It's Rei-centric, and revolves around his mother's death and some frustrations with a flux tome and his dark powers taking him over. Oo Oh yeah, and could someone translate a little thing into Latin for me? I need a spell for Flux. 

I suppose those who know me are wondering why the main character is Nino when I'm so obviously a Lucius fan.

Simple as this: If it were a Lucius fic, I couldn't resist the urge to add graphic rape and uh... is R-rated at most. So then, I just thought of everyone who's all naïve, and it came down to Nino and Florina. And Nino is so much angstier!

...Uhh... review? (And DO comment on how well my OC was done. I cringe at the fact I had an OC romance. dies Even if it was one-sided.)


End file.
